Alec Greven, the nine-year-old Colorado author of How to Talk to Girls, is now a bona fide media star, thanks to an appearance on the Ellen show and our culture’s seemingly insatiable desire for a return to the simplicities and certainties of childhood. Greven’s 46-page book includes advice such as “don’t wear sweats” when courting a girl, and try to attract “regular girls,” because “pretty girls are a lot of work.” (Greven does appear wise beyond his years in dispensing at least one piece of advice: “Girls win most of the arguments and have most of the power. If you know that now, things might be easier.”)The book has been such a success “ film rights have been sold to 20th Century Fox “ that others are in the works. The CBC reports that Greven is gearing up to write How to Talk to Moms (to be published around Mother’s Day), How to Talk to Dads (Father’s Day), and even How to Talk to Santa (the Fourth of July Christmas).

If these become the runaway successes that Greven’s publisher, HarperCollins, no doubt hopes they will be, Quillblog would like to suggest some other titles that might be appropriate for the series:

• How to Talk to Bankruptcy Lawyers (for businesspeople hit by the recession)
• How to Talk to the Opposition (for prime ministers of minority governments)
• How to Talk to Prime Ministers (for Yann Martel)
• How to Talk to Plumbers (for John McCain)