In the latest issue of The New Yorker, Ellis Weiner takes a satirical look at how U.S. publishing houses are coping in a down market. In this Shouts & Murmurs piece, an intern “brought on … to replace the promotion department” at the fledgling (fictional) Propensity Books outlines the company’s marketing plans for an author’s book:

To start: Do you blog? If not, get in touch with Kris and Christopher from our online department, although at this point I think only Christopher is left. I’ll be out of the office from tomorrow until Monday, but when I get back I’ll ask him if he spoke to you. We use CopyBuoy via Hoster Broaster, because it streams really easily into a Plaxo/LinkedIn yak-fest meld. When you register, click Endless, and under Contacts just list everyone you’ve ever met. It would be great if you could post at least six hundred words every day until further notice.

The company has its eyes set on traditional media “gets” as well:

Once we get back from Frankfurt, we’d like to see you on morning talk shows like the Today show and The View, so please get yourself booked on them and keep us in the loop. If I’m not here “ which I won’t be, since after the book fair I go on vacation for two weeks “ just tell Jenni, my assistant, when she gets back from jury duty.